2021 Focus | Helping Youth To Develop Self-Awareness

Stephanie L. Mann

helping children to develop self-awareness


Many adults don’t realize that children lacking self-awareness can grow up to become a threat to themselves, their families, communities and society. We have seen today’s youth ransack, loot and destroy cities as their anger turns against police. The following example helps us understand why children need their own identities to keep everyone safe and healthy. 

In 1951, J. D. Salinger wrote the widely acclaimed classic novel The Catcher in the Rye. The book has been linked to several murders and murder attempts.

- In 1961, President Ronald Reagan was shot by John Hinckley, Jr. 

- In 1980, John Lennon was killed by Mark David Chapman in New York City with a copy of “Catcher in the Rye” in his pocket. 

- In 1989, Rebecca Schaffer, was shot by Robert John Bardo in the doorway of her home.

It’s been acknowledged that these three men were stalkers who read and identified with the book’s fictional character, Holden Caulfield. 

What did Chapman, Hinckley and Bardo have in common with Holden Caulfield? They identified with his world view and railed against the “phoniness” of the adult world and became lonely and emotionally unstable.

Many young people today are followers and go along with the wrong crowd because they lack an identity. 

When children are abused or neglected, parents often fail to give them the emotional tools needed to develop their identities. Young people don’t know how to handle fear, disappointment, anger or rejection. They may fill the void by latching on to a famous or not so famous person and stalking them for attention. They become obsessed as they stalk a fantasy relationship. Feeling rejected, alone and angry, emotional immature people may also turn to drugs, become suicidal, destroy property, themselves or other people. 

We need to look at self-destructive behavior from a broader perspective. Today, we live in a society with increasing drug and porn abuse, domestic and child abuse, road rage, sex addiction, suicide, homelessness and murder. Americans lacking identities and feeling powerless may give up or try to control other people’s lives. Some people can become mentally disturbed as they blame others and become self-destructive. 


“Every child has undiscovered talents with the ability to develop the 3C’s, Courage, Character and a self-protective Conscience.”


Most parents focus on a good education for children to become successful. However, that is not as important as giving children the emotional tools to handle the slings and arrows of life. With adult guidance, children can develop self-confidence, self-control and self-determination.

Every child has undiscovered talents with the ability to develop the 3C’s, Courage, Character and a self-protective Conscience which is critical for a happy, self-reliant life. When youth discover the power of their divine inner spirit (Identity) they will understand the inner journey from bondage to freedom. 

If we want community peace and unity in the future, we need to discuss the power of the human spirit to overcome any obstacle. To ignore children’s inner spirit and fail to help them develop self-awareness (identities) is to deprive them of a happy, safe and self-confident future.


Stephanie L. Mann, Crime & Violence Prevention Consultant and Author of Empowerment Parenting: How to raise children who become happy, self-reliant adults.

Stephanie was named the November 2020 Influencer Superstar by the ImageMakers & Influencers Magazine because of her inspiring and important work to bring awareness to children’s safety and development.


Header Image by Kat J via Unsplash

Article by Stephanie L. Mann

Graphics and editing by ImageMakers & Influencers Magazine


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